Nirvana, here I come

Today I styled my hair just like my new best friend Artem (not actually my friend). I have made a very big decision – I will go ahead and get my “2046” haircut. I will be cool, I may even buy spats (http://www.benlocker.com/blog/?p=178). Progress, you little charlot. A full life is maybe 70, 80 years? We cram it full of shit – brand new televisions, homeopathic remedies, self-defense classes, comprehensive lists of battlefield locations. Goddamn it all to hell, all I ever wanted was a nice haircut and a few accessories, a little pussy and a whole lot of senseless fun.

Wong Kar Wai did this to me

I watched Wong Kar Wai’s “2046” tonight. I’d heard mixed reviews of it and was expecting it to be a little clumsy. In the beginning I saw it was so well framed I was ready to forgive any bad acting or messy plot; by half way I was becoming very attached to the picture; and as it was nearing the end I was thinking it may be a masterpiece. The overwhelming nuance of time and memory and the continual overlap of storyline and conflict of personalities, each with their own timeline and memories, was amazing; together with the overlap of previous Wong Kar Wai movies and future ones it became something akin to truth – that indefinable, yet somehow tangible reality.

I’m getting over a cold – another one, which is strange for me. I watched a movie thinking it would be a pleasant way to pass the time and distract me from working, but it was too exciting. The movie made me want to start smoking and had me drinking whisky before it was finished, even though I’d planned not to drink till I’d stopped coughing up disease from my sticky lungs. Then afterwards I gave myself a side-parting like Tony Leung Chiu Wai, painted a fake moustache on my upper-lip, and drew this. Who the hell ever said “just be yourself”? Everything I love and ever loved has been on a pedestal. I’ve been myself, let me be you for a while.